Oh, Dorothy where have you gone?

One day you may wake up in a different land In a different color

Was my life black and white before? Everything seems different Vivid

I'm not sure if this is real or was my life not real before? Was I even paying attention?

It's strange and perhaps uncomfortable but this seems like something I need to do.

I need to explore I need to know

Everything changes but nothing seems recognizable anymore

I asked for new opportunities yet I didn't realize how many things I would lose to make room for this new chapter, perhaps, this new book.

Things are moving faster, shifts are more complete.

It's not enough to do something in a small way, a slight commitment, a half measure. It's either for me or not. I can tell quickly. I don't need to wonder for days, weeks or months. I know. Sometimes I still pretend that I don't but I do. I feel it in my body, in my soul. It's a match or it's not. I can tell if something is here for a time, for a reason. I wait for my lesson. Once I figure it out, like a puzzle, I know it's time to move on.

This version of me is so different. She knows, she doesn't make excuses, she is kind but there are strong boundaries and understandings. There is a truth in every choice, every movement, every word.

Not unlike Dorothy in Oz she is in a new land, uncharted territory but instead of looking for a false wizard she knows the truth lies inside of her. It is like I am watching someone else. Someone I don't completely know. I am stronger than I've ever been yet I fear that strength. I am excited for new experiences yet I am nervous to see where they take me. Is it possible to live in two spaces? In two personalities? Or am I just in the between of who I was and who I'm becoming. It doesn't seem like a dream. It finally feels like I've found the truth. The reality of who I've always been but have tried to hide. What happens when I am myself? Not hiding anything. Standing tall and proud of every belief, folly, mistake and choice. Will I be an outcast? Not accepted? I never felt like I fit in before, in that black and white existence. Things were never right even when I followed the rules.

I went into the tornado. I turned myself inside out. I lost and I destroyed. I sat in the debris and wondered what I had done.

And then I saw it

The rainbow The colors

I saw myself in a new way. I looked different but perhaps more jolting was how different I have felt. I still have work to do. I am still questioning everything but those conversations are shorter, quieter. I'm following my heart. I am starting again in a new space and it is scary, it is also everything I've dreamed. I know that I know less in every moment yet I seem to know myself more than I ever have before. The transition is complete. I have found my new footing. Welcome to Oz.